Living with Kindness Is a Choice

Living with Kindness Is a Choice

                    What you do makes a difference, and you have to decide                         what kind of difference you want to make.
- Jane Goodall -

 

As Larry and I continue to explore what it means to us to live with kindness, we have discovered that there are several aspects of the kindness path that are defined by words that begin with the letter C. Here is a good starting point:

Choice

Choosing kindness is a choice of love over the fear and despair that cause many people to stop believing in their power to make a difference in the world, even in their own lives.

It is a conscious choice to be on a path of kindness, no matter how other people show up.

Our choice is grounded in our vision of the world we want to live in. We have a vision of a better world in which people live with kindness and consideration for each other. That has become the template for our lives today.

When we choose to live that way, our lives help to strengthen the power of love and kindness in the world. We uplift our own lives and the lives of those we encounter.

Being on a kindness path is not just about random acts of kindness. It is a choice to become the change we wish to see in the world. It is a conscious decision to live as love in action.

Think of yourself as love with its work boots on, not passively sitting at home, thinking kind thoughts, but out in the world, bringing love with you wherever you go. When you make that choice, you engage the transformative power of love in your life.

When you choose a kindness path, you are not just choosing to act kindly. You are choosing to be kind because that becomes who you are. With that realization, you understand that it is never about how someone else is behaving. It is about you – who you are.

What is a Kindness Path?

When we have chosen to live with kindness, we create our own unique path. We each get to choose what that path looks like. Since you are reading this, I assume that you already have your own path.

For some people, it means continuing a habit of small acts of kindness as they go through their day.

For others, it may mean expanding their circle of kindness to included people they had passed by but had not noticed before.

For some, it means joining together with others by volunteering for an organization that is helping people meet their needs or enhance their lives in some way.

No matter how you choose to express your kindness, you are helping to make a difference in the world.

Allowing Others

A key to walking any kindness path is choosing to allow other people to show up as they are.

It helps me when I realize that I do not have enough information to judge others. I do not know their life story, and if I did, I would probably understand why they’re making the choices that they are making now in their lives.

But I don’t need to know their story. I can be kind because it is who I am – rather than being unkind, because of who I judge them to be.

Once we choose to be allowing of others, opportunities always show up to enable us to see how well we’re doing.

We do not go from reacting to allowing overnight. It takes practice, and I have failed many times to stay connected to the kindness that I had chosen to be.

One incident in my life was another test for me, after several in which I had not responded as I later wished I had. A few years ago, due to difficulty walking on my own, I especially needed help going up stairs. I was in a public building, and a friend stepped up to help me. We were going slowly up the narrow staircase with our arms around each other, when a man came up quickly behind us and made a rude, impatient comment.

My friend spoke harshly to the man, and he was quiet the rest of the way up the stairs. When we got to the top and the man passed us, I thanked him for his patience. He had, in fact, been patient after having been chastised.

My friend scolded me for thanking the man. He had, after all, been rude to me.

“Yes,” I said. "And then, he was patient, and that needed to be acknowledged.” It was an opportunity for me to show kindness to someone who apparently needed it.

Later, I realized that I had finally responded, not with internal reminders to be kind, but naturally. Kindness was becoming who I am. I am still in the becoming stage – not nearly there yet, but getting closer as I travel my path.

The kindness path is very forgiving, allowing each of us to grow in our own way.

As you walk your path,  I invite you to continue to join us, as we share the rest of the 7 Cs of kindness.

Above all, enjoy your journey.

    Image by reneebigelow from Pixabay

Now, we invite you to enjoy one of our favorite songs:

I CHOOSE LOVE - SHAWN GALLAWAY 

The 7 Cs of kindness are words that define important aspects of a kindness journey. We invite you to check out the others: Choice, Commitment, Connection, Curiosity, Courage, Compassion and Change.

 

What are your thoughts?  Please leave a comment below.

Help us spread the message of kindness. If you know others who might appreciate these ideas, please share below.

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We’re grateful that you are on this journey with us.

With love from our hearts to yours,

Pat and Larry

Pat is co-founder of Living with Kindness. Proud mother of two and grandmother of three, she is a writer with a background in social services, social justice and mediation.

4 Comments

  1. Yes, being kind is a choice for sure. It seems like life is out of balance when one is unkind. I have to think when one is acting ugly to me or another that there is some kind of suffering going on with that person.

    • That is a good insight, Maggie. We usually don’t know about what people are experiencing in their lives that leads to their behavior.

  2. Thank you for sharing your thoughts on how kindness is a Choice! Spot on! I loved your story about the man on the stairs and the kindness you chose to give by thanking him at the top of the stairs. That brought a smile to my face and a bounce in my step to start my day!

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